As dusk approaches, my oldest and I slip out to the trail behind our new home for a stroll. The birds chirp as a slight breeze rustles through the trees – music to my ears.
He looks at me with a special smile and grabs my hand. Both of us are lost in thought. I savor the moment and marvel at this season I have with my son, walking hand-in-hand. I know it won’t last forever.
Sure enough, as we round the corner and come to the main road, he releases my hand and stands just a tad taller as his stride lengthens. I sense the subtle change of seasons that is slowly underway.
Part of me wants to grasp a hold of what we had, but I check myself. This is at it should be – the gradual move towards independence. I must hold lightly and remember that my goal is to raise children who are independent from us and yet dependent on the Lord.
This happens step-by-step, day-by-day, as we walk and talk and live life together. As I look back to my own growing up, I remember the two steps forward and then stepping back as if in a dance. I yearned for independence and yet craved the intimacy of family, of belonging. Did my parents marvel at this slow transition – the budding of a separate identity? I don’t remember them hovering or holding me back. Maybe that’s why I know this slow progression is normal and will work itself out. It’s all part of the dance. And now it’s a dance that I get to do with my own children. Always there for them, but not hovering. Preparing and then letting them spread their wings…
Sometimes intentional parenting, means intentionally letting go – and embracing each season as it comes and goes.
Looking forward to the seasons ahead and delighting in the time we have today!
Heather says
I literally just had this same experience on a trail the other day. I laughed and chatted about it with my daughter and realized the very lesson you’ve written. So hard and yet so freeing as well. I’m sure our job will continue for many years, even so 🙂
Colene says
I love this. Yes. Letting go is a process that starts early. You are letting him go … But Jesus has him in His hands.